Tomato sorry

Bwoek, sorry, ik heb gebierd, kaas-gevlinderd en kroe-gepoekt. Ben nu een beetje mislijk, maar dat kan ook nog beestje zijn. Dus maar even een stukje gejat weer, ditmaal uit The Fast Show, heerlijk:

PW is in the pub with his mates MW, SD & JT, playing a drinking game
MW    …aspara-
*3       Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha!
SD     Forfeit!  Forfeit!  Ha-ha-ha-ha!
PW    It was carrots.
JT      Ah.  Now, get it roight this time, cos I’m dyin’ o’ thirst over ‘ere.
SD     Right.  Ding-ding!  Round two!
MW   Tomato – what – aubergine – would – potato – you – turnip – like – carrots –
          to – asparagus – drink?
SD     Oh-ho-ho!
JT      Tomato – pint… aubergine – of – potato – best – turnip – please!
*4       A-ha!  Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
(MW goes off to get the drinks.  CH appears at the door, looking around for PW.  when he finds him, he leans down to PW’s ear to say quietly…)
CH     Ted, there’s something I need to speak to you about.
SD     Oi nominate Mr Mayhew.
*3       Ha-ha-ha!
CH     Sorry?
*3       No!  No, no, no!
JT      Forfeit!  Forfeit!  You ‘ave to say tomato.
CH     I beg your pardon?
*2       A-ha-ha!
SD     You’ve got to put a vegetable in front of each word, in the right order.
JT      Look – this is ‘ow it goes, roight?  Tomatoes – aubergine – potato – turnip –
          carrot – asparagus, then you add one o’ your own, and then it’s back to
          tomatoes again.
          slight pause
CH     Yes, I’m sorry, I really have no idea what you’re talking…
*3       Warrgh!  No!  Ha-ha-ha!
SD     Forfeit!  Forfeit!
JT      Tomato – you – aubergine – have – potato – to – turnip – say – carrot –
          the – asparagus – roight – broccoli – vegetables!
SD     Ha-ha-ha!  Or-o-or, aubergine – it’s – potato – a – turnip – forfeit.
PW    (It’s a drinking game, sor.)
          pause
CH    (Look Ted, I really do need-)
*3      Barrrgh!  Forfeit!
          pause as CH stands up to address them…
CH    It’s, er, I’m very sorry, under normal circumstances – believe you me – I-I
          would like nothing more than to, er, join you in your game, but… not
          tonight, please.
PW    Go on, sor, go on.  Go on – it’ll be a bit o’ fun, sor.
            slight pause
CH    (Yes, Ted, really, I must-)
          MW comes back from the bar at that point and interrupts CH
MW   Tomato – ‘ere’s – aubergine – your – potato – drinks.
SD     It’s all roight – we got a new nominee.
MW   Wahey!
SD     Ha-ha-ha!
CH     (It’s a private matter-)
*3      BONG!  Wa-ha-ha!  Wahey!
          pause as CH finally admits defeat, and decides to play along…
CH    Er, er, tomato – it’s – aubergine – a… potato – private – turnip – matter.
*2      A-ha!
JT     See?  You’re gettin’ the ‘ang of it, now.  That’s roight!
PW   That’s right – don’t be embarrassed, sor.  Go on, it’s just a little bit o’ fun.
          pause as CH gulps back a shot of whisky to pluck up courage…
CH    Tomato – Ted… aubergine – your… potato – wife’s… turnip – dead.
          PW’s is grinning widely, until the word “dead”, when it drops like a stone!
          the others are all instantly subdued and look down at their feet
CH    Erm, I’m sorry.  I really am sorry.  Erm, I mean, tomato sorry.

Eh, Tomato, sorry, aubergine, for, potato, the, turnip, layout

EDIT: Omdat het niet goed te volgen is vanaf papier, is hierboven een linkje geplaatst.